My first STD was from a foam party
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize