So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
