Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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