So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize