He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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