yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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