Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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