he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
