I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just blew my weed a kiss
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
