does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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