Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
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