I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers