Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
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