it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
