Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I think I died a long time ago.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
