she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
