At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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