he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
there is glitter all over my balls
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