"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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