So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
