Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
