Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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