Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(208): View more from Idaho

I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(208): I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe. http://tfl.nu/02tv

Replies (19) Good night (3856) Bad night (999) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(571): View more from Virginia

Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..

(703): View more from Virginia

this can't be going anywhere good

(571): View more from Virginia

nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(571): Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah.. (703): this can't be going anywhere good (571): nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\ http://tfl.nu/4i13

Replies (196) Good night (1790) Bad night (26547)
Favorite
(614): View more from Ohio

So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(614): So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night http://tfl.nu/bxgc

Replies (13) Good night (6449) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(510): View more from California

At what point did I eat out of your mouth?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(510): At what point did I eat out of your mouth? http://tfl.nu/tcp8

Replies (9) Good night (896) Bad night (4244) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(340): View more from US Virgin Islands

well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(340): well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt http://tfl.nu/yxfk

Replies (21) Good night (3299) Bad night (725) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(360): View more from Washington

Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(360): Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month http://tfl.nu/vjm5

Replies (16) Good night (2014) Bad night (3733) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(404): View more from Georgia

The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(404): The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant http://tfl.nu/hmmb

Replies (8) Good night (704) Bad night (3867) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks. http://tfl.nu/40kn

Replies (3) Good night (1527) Bad night (428)
Favorite
(704): View more from North Carolina

So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(704): So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ... http://tfl.nu/bcgx

Replies (5) Good night (442) Bad night (1034) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(609): View more from New Jersey

Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(609): Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles? (1-609): In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions http://tfl.nu/67pw

Replies (2) Good night (1716) Bad night (405)
Favorite
(585): View more from New York

If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(585): If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed http://tfl.nu/2pf8

Replies (6) Good night (1623) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(417): View more from Missouri

Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(417): Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like. http://tfl.nu/oino

Replies (1) Good night (1161) Bad night (349)
Favorite
(952): View more from Minnesota

You went home with a man in a loincloth

(914): View more from New York

I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(952): You went home with a man in a loincloth (914): I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween??? http://tfl.nu/0bv2

Replies (2) Good night (1159) Bad night (238)
Favorite
(805): View more from California

Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(805): Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message. http://tfl.nu/tlvz

Replies (1) Good night (518) Bad night (221)
Favorite
(773): View more from Illinois

And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.

(1-773): View more from Illinois

That's my new pick up line call me a polish name

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(773): And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad. (1-773): That's my new pick up line call me a polish name http://tfl.nu/jbx5

Replies (5) Good night (736) Bad night (191)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: