Where did you get a picture of my penis
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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