Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
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HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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