You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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