Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize