It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
