how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
