you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
