Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize