I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize