SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
