I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
