I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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