I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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