I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
