you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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