Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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