if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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