I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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