he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize