I'm so fucking centered right now
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize
