I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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