He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
