Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Don't EVER smell your tampon
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
