she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
