Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize