Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
