Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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